The Level of Stupid, It Hurts

If you wrote this into a fictional story, people would say you were being ridiculous. But it really happened. From Not the Bee: Pennsylvania cops say wife shot husband during argument over gun safety to prove her point

He would leave his 9mm pistol laying around, so she shot him to teach him a lesson. Or something.

Unfortunately, it was the last lesson her husband was ever going to learn.

She is facing charges of criminal homicide, aggravated assault and reckless endangerment.

On the plus side, the gun has finally been stored far away from the children … in the evidence locker.

I fully expect the Clancy Brigade to explain to all of us how this wasn't her fault in about 3 minutes, though it might not get the national attention Clancy got.

Stupid Criminal Brags About Crime Online

Confession. Signed, sealed, and insane. VIDEO: WOMAN ROBS GAS STATION, SHOOTS EMPLOYEE, AND THEN BRAGS ABOUT IT | CHARLOTTE ALERTS NEWS

Shantay O’Donnell, 46, robbed a gas station in Howard County, Maryland in April 2026, video shows. Shantay then made a video bragging about the robbery and told the world about her plans to rob a Starbucks and burn the DSS building.

Howard County, Maryland, is about 5 miles southwest of Baltimore, and about 15 miles northeast of Washington, DC.

She also mentioned that she robbed a Starbucks of $40. (Doesn't she know that the Starbucks' customers are beyond cash?)

Apparently she didn't think cops looked at the internet.

Shantay was later arrested charged with robbery and attempted murder.

If this was Chicago, or NYC, she would probably be back out on the street in less time than it takes to do the paperwork. I have no idea how Howard County handles such things, but it is in a blue state...

Don't Bring a Crossbow to a Gunfight

I don't usually cover cops defending themselves, but this is more of a Stupid Criminals post. Decatur Police Chief responds after bodycam footage released of shooting involving officers, man with crossbow | WCIA

And yes, this is from some time ago. It only recently came to my attention by way of the video embedded below.

The body camera footage following an officer involved shooting last month in Decatur was released on Thursday. Now, there are also new details about what led up to it.

Decatur Police said that 54-year-old, Michael Boliard pointed a crossbow at people and officers on April 22 in broad daylight and near a busy transit center.

He pointed a crossbow at police. He got shot, multiple times. Cops then rendered aid, until an ambulance could arrive and take him to a local hospital.

Boliard is sitting in the Macon County Jail ahead of his trial. He’s been charged with aggravated assault of a peace officer, aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, possession of a controlled substance and armed violence.

Macon County, Illinois, is home to Decatur. It is 135 miles due west of Indianapolis, Indiana. It is about a 180 mile drive south-southeast of Chicago.

The three officers were not charged in the shooting.

This is the Allegedly Illinois video Who Brings A Crossbow To A Gunfight?

Drugs Can Be Hazardous to Your Health

They can make you do stupid shit. This guy is lucky that people only shot in his direction. Sheriff's Office: Man high on meth was an unwelcomed guest at neighbors' homes - WJER Radio 100.9FM & 1450AM

First, he called 911 on himself. He was incoherent, and he hung up, so 911 called him back. He said he didn't feel safe in his own home. And so he went in search of that feeling of safety. (Hint: He didn't find it.)

Tuscarawas County Sheriff’s Detective Captain Adam Fisher says the 46-year-old suspect made a confusing call to 9-1-1 around 11:30 p.m. on Wednesday, providing just his McKinley Avenue address. Dispatchers called him back. He said he feared for his life, did not feel safe in his own home and was going to start walking down the street to contact neighbors.

Fisher says the man entered at least three homes. One homeowner fired a warning shot to get him to leave and another homeowner shoved him back outside.

So in at least one situation, he is lucky to not have been shot.

New Philadelphia, Ohio is about a 45 mile drive south of Akron.

Deputies found this guy, and took him to a local hospital.

Fisher says the man allegedly ingested methamphetamine which led to his erratic behavior. He faces one charge – trespassing into a habitation – but Fisher anticipates more.

Sadly felony stupidity is not something he can be charged with in the State of Ohio.

He was still in the hospital when this article was written. When the doctors are done with him, he will be taken to the county lockup.

The Award for Stupid Criminal of the Year Goes To...

A lot of criminals are stupid, but few are this stupid. Woman incriminates herself in reply to post insulting thief: ‘This woman called me trash’

A woman was on vacation when she was notified that her home had been broken into. She posted photos and a scathing remark on F*c*book.

When Davidson’s plane landed, she found that Cape had incriminated herself, replying to the Facebook post and allegedly admitting her guilt.

“People need to mind their own business. This woman called me trash… just because I broke in her house and stole some stuff. She don’t even know me. But thinks it’s ok to call me trash,” Cape wrote.

She hadn't been arrested at the time the article published, and I doubt we will hear more about this trash.

Sometimes I think humanity doesn't desrve to survive.

Play With Fire and Get Burned

They likely thought they would never lose control of the servers. Oops: DanaBot Malware Devs Infected Their Own PCs

Cybercrime is a now a business. DanaBot is what's known as a malware-as-a-service offering. For a monthly fee criminals get access to an infrastructure that helps with phishing campaigns, stealing data from large corporations, or, in this case espionage.

The U.S. government today unsealed criminal charges against 16 individuals accused of operating and selling DanaBot, a prolific strain of information-stealing malware that has been sold on Russian cybercrime forums since 2018. The FBI says a newer version of DanaBot was used for espionage, and that many of the defendants exposed their real-life identities after accidentally infecting their own systems with the malware.

The FBI found the data when they took control of the servers, which had the defendants info on them.

“In some cases, such self-infections appeared to be deliberately done in order to test, analyze, or improve the malware,” the criminal complaint reads. “In other cases, the infections seemed to be inadvertent – one of the hazards of committing cybercrime is that criminals will sometimes infect themselves with their own malware by mistake.”

This is the 2nd malware-as-a-service provider to be taken down in 2 days. Lumma Stealer was "disrupted" by a group of tech companies.

Once Again, You Cannot Just Shoot Anyone on Your Property

Two people needed help. They approached a home. Both were shot; one died. Bart Cauthen Coweta County fire chief shot dead by homeowner after deer accident

Police say, local resident, William Randall Franklin allegedly ‘opened fire on Chief Cauthen and the individuals that struck the deer,’ killing the fire chief and injuring the husband as the two men made their way along the road as the man’s wife remained in the vehicle.

Investigators believe that Cauthen had stopped to help the stranded husband and wife after noticing their damaged vehicle and injured deer when leaving his nearby property

Chambers County, Alabama is a rural area about a two hour drive northeast of Montgomery.

Investigators allege that Franklin, 33, shot at Cauthen and the driver ‘without warning’ as they ‘approached the driveway’ of the man’s home. The driver was also armed and returned fire, injuring Franklin.

"Open fire without warning" is an ambush. That is not legal. It is not ethical. It doesn't make sense. Don't be that guy.

Franklin is expected to survive and will face a murder charge upon his release from Piedmont Medical Center.

This is Felony Stupidity if ever there was a case.

You Can't Just Shoot Anybody Who Is on Your Property

Your home is not a free fire zone. Every bullet comes with a lawyer attached. Homeowner charged for shooting grocery delivery driver after his wife ordered from Instacart and didn’t tell him

The guy was just trying to deliver an Instacart order to the address, when the guy who lived there shot him in the legs.

The driver’s wife, Jessica Thomas, said the family was delivering an order from Weis Markets and gave officers their Instacart paperwork.

Her husband went to drop off the groceries but returned bleeding in his leg, she told police, according to the outlet.

Sabo has been booked on charges of recklessly endangering another person and additional charges may be presented at a later date.

Don't be a jerk, and save yourself a world of hurt.

If You Point a Gun at Police, Expect to Get Shot

The rules are pretty simple. 50-year-old man shot by officers after pointing gun at sergeant in Brooklyn: police

Police were in the area for a shots-fired called, when they spotted the suspect coming out of a convenience store.

Police say the man hid behind a tree, turned and pointed a gun at a police sergeant.

"The officers verbally identified themselves and gave the male numerous verbal commands to which he did not comply," Philip Rivera, NYPD chief of patrol, said in a news conference.

Four officers "shot at him." He was hit, but I don't know by how many.

Neighbors were shocked - shocked I tell you - to discover that crime does happen in Brooklyn. Or something.

Criminals Are Stupid, But This Guy Is Extra Stupid

I read a lot of stories about stupid people doing stupid things, but this guy takes the cake. Armed parents interrupted home burglary, Georgia cops say | Tri-City Herald

Investigators say the man “forcefully” entered the home when the homeowners were away and proceeded to rifle through their belongings.

“While inside he found the homeowners’ jar of change and decided to take said change and purchase copious amounts of adult beverages,” police said.

So how stupid was this guy? He returned to the home he had burglarized to consume those adult beverages. He drank until he passed out.

That’s when “the homeowners’ parents arrived” with a rifle and summoned the police. The suspect was arrested and is charged with burglary, officials said.

Police came up with all the suggestions you can imagine (or click thru). Sadly, he cannot be charged with felony stupidity. He is charged with burglary.

“If you do allegedly commit a burglary, don’t allegedly burglarize a residence that is protected by parents who believe in the 2nd Amendment.”

Lavonia is about a 90-mile drive northeast of Atlanta, near the South Carolina state line.

He Literally Shot Himself in the Foot

The jokes are writing themselves these days, which is a good thing, because I am no comedy writer. Man accidentally shoots himself while trying to break into Madison home, police say

He broke into an occupied home and confronted the homeowner.

The suspect shot himself in the legs or feet with his own gun, according to police. The shooting happened in the home’s backyard.

Cops arrived and took him to a local hospital for treatment. No word on what charges he will face.

Not a Darwin Award, but he was sure trying. I guess we have to tally this as Bad Guys -1. You just know that he was convinced having a gun made him dangerous. In a way, he was right. This is an "Own Goal" if ever I read about one.

Epic Failure of the Victim-Selection Process

If you're going to break into homes, you should probably try to avoid off-duty police. APD: Man tries to break into off-duty officer’s apartment, falls 3 stories after being shot at

Investigators say an off-duty Atlanta police officer fired at a man who tried to break into the officer’s apartment. [SNIP]

Police say the officer, who was home and off-duty at the time, grabbed a gun and fired toward the man.

He wasn't hit by gunfire, but he fell 3 stories, and suffered "non-life threatening injuries."

No names were released. A neighbor - also anonymous - said that there has been a rash of burglaries around the apartment complex. I'm thinking there is a good chance they will stop now.

The investigation continues, but self-defense is a human-right.

You Can't Just Shoot at People On Your Property

This is one of the least-surprising verdicts of the last few years. ‘You just don’t get it.’ Judge admonishes NY man who fatally shot woman in his driveway and sentences him to 25 years to life

They turned into his driveway by mistake. He shot at a car full of people - as far as anyone can tell - without cause. He killed 20-year-old Kaylin Gillis. He was convicted of 2nd degree murder and sentenced to 25 years to life.

As Tam, at View from the Porch has pointed out, your property is Not a free-fire zone. And as we used to tell students in the NRA classes I helped teach, every bullet comes with a lawyer attached, so you should be sure of your actions before shooting someone.

The judge said that the defendant just didn't get it. He didn't get that what he did was wrong. They were on his property, and even though they posed absolutely no threat, he opened fire. Hint: Being lost and asking for directions is not grounds for killing someone.

[Washington County Judge Adam] Michelini added, “Any remorse you have isn’t for the harm you’ve caused. The only regret you have is that you’re finally facing the consequences for your actions. You murdered Kaylin Gillis. You shot at a car full of people and you didn’t care what would happen and you repeatedly lied about it. You deserve to spend the maximum time in prison allowable under our law, and I don’t make this decision because it’s easy. I make it because it’s what’s deserved. I make it because it’s what’s just.”

Don't be stupid. Don't be reckless. You might end up spending a long time in prison, because even if felony stupidity is not a crime, manslaughter and murder are crimes.

He Had an "Extensive Criminal History"

He also apparently thought that robbing a bank was a good idea. Man with hostages at Florida bank shot, killed by SWAT sniper | The National Desk

I'm thinking that his day didn't work out the he had planned.

Fort Meyers is on the Gulf Coast of Florida, about 90 miles south of St. Petersburg.

Sterling Ramon Alavache, 36, tried to rob a bank in Fort Myers, Florida. He had a knife, and said that he had a bomb. Things went sideways and he ended up holding 2 people hostage. During negotiations he became violent toward one of the hostages.

"He became physical, he started to put one of the hostage in a head-lock and had the knife to her throat," described [Sheriff Carmine] Marceno.

A SWAT sniper shot and killed Alavache.

Marceno explained that the suspect's actions are why he was shot.

"We were in fear for her life and safety," said Marceno.

I'm sure there will be protests and calls for "Justice." Of course if he had actually killed the hostage that wouldn't be the case. But the truth is, once SWAT showed up he was not going to walk away. He could have surrendered, but I'm sure he thought he could "get out of it" by threatening the hostage. He was wrong.

If They Were Smart They Wouldn't Be Criminals

With friends like this, who needs enemies? Chicago man murdered his friend on Instagram Live, prosecutors say - CWB Chicago

DeAndre Adams, 25, began streaming on Instagram around 9 a.m. on February 7 and continued while walking to his mother’s house to do laundry. His friend, Edwin Sims, 24, met him at his mother’s house and walked with him back to Adams’ apartment as the live stream continued, according to prosecutor Anne McCord. [SNIP].

Suddenly, the Instagram stream showed Sims firing several shots at Adams from behind, striking him in the back of the head and body, McCord alleged. She said the live feed also captured Sims bending over with a gun in his hand to end the Instagram feed after the murder.

Despite the video evidence, he says he didn't do it. And his public defender has the worst take, of all public defender takes. (They have to say something.)

His public defender said he took some business classes at the college level and tries to support his young daughter.

"Tries" being the operative word in that sentence.

Despite what the public defender had to say, he is held without bond.

There is more, click thru.

Sadly He Can't Be Charged with Felony Stupidity

But then if he wasn't stupid he probably wouldn't be a criminal. Armed robber stayed at crime scene to eat victim's fried chicken, prosecutors say - CWB Chicago

A Chicago man is facing a bucket of felony charges after allegedly robbing a man at gunpoint and then staying at the scene to eat the victim’s takeout fried chicken.

After stealing the car, 2 dollars in cash, a debit card, and a takeout order of fried chicken, he stopped to work on the chicken. Cops arrested him before he was finished.

He faces up to 21 years in prison on the armed robbery, but in Chicago I doubt he will be charged with much, because keeping violent criminals in jail is unfair.

No Honor Among Thieves

I guess some things never change. Tennessee car burglar begs neighbors for help after injured homeowner returns fire on group of suspects: cops | Fox News

Of the 4 guys who were breaking into cars, three got away. They just left their buddy behind.

The unidentified homeowner living in the Websters Grove subdivision in Shelby County said he received a call from a neighbor on Thursday evening that there were several people standing outside his residence, Shelby County deputies told CBS Memphis affiliate WREG.

The homeowner told authorities that when he went outside, he saw two men in his driveway and another two men sitting in a white car on the street. The two in the driveway made a run for it when they spotted the homeowner, with one suspect firing a gun at the homeowner.

The homeowner was struck in the ankle but he returned fire. Like I said, the 3 without honor abandoned their buddy. 18-year-old Marreo Mays was arrested. He has been charged with burglary and vandalism.

I'm not sure that going to investigate was the wisest move, but I do understand why people do it. I will only point out he is lucky that his injury wasn't worse than being shot in the ankle.

As for the guy who got arrested, he is clearly not the sharpest tool in the shed.

A suspected car burglar in Tennessee found himself begging for help from area residents after his intended victim returned gunfire, according to the local sheriff's office.

How is that supposed to work? "Hi, me and my buddies were burglarizing you neighbor's car, but they left me behind. Can you help me out?"

Self-defense is a human-right, and Tennessee is not New Jersey.

Pictures with Wads of Cash Never Bode Well

Since he was involved in Mass Shootings so I won't lose too much sleep over this guy. Police: Man Involved in Midtown Mass Shootings Dies After Being Shot by LPD Captain He Tried to Run Over.

Polk County, Florida is roughly halfway between Tampa and Orlando. Winter Haven, Florida is roughly in the center of Polk County, about 40 miles SW of Orlando.

Pandemonium took over on Winter Haven’s Havendale Boulevard at about 2 p.m. Monday when a suspect connected to last week’s mass shooting in Lakeland fled from law enforcement officers, was involved in several crashes and a carjacking, and was then shot to death by a Lakeland Police captain whom the suspect tried to run over.

Polk County deputies, Lakeland Police, the BATFE, and Florida Dept. of of Law Enforcement were watching this guy because they thought he was involved in a mass shooting last week. There was an outstanding warrant and they had hoped to take him in to custody. But that didn't work out as planned.

They were about to serve the warrant when Greene jumped into a white Silverado pickup truck and sped away, with Lakeland Police officers chasing him. Greene traveled north into Winter Haven, winding up on Havendale Boulevard as he weaved in and out of traffic.

Click thru for a description of the chase, a foot chase, a car stolen, the attempt to run over a Lakeland Police Dept. captain, a shooting and a crash.

And we get a statement from my favorite sheriff, Grady Judd.

“Only the wicked flee when the police try to stop them and that’s what occurred here,” Judd said. “Had he simply not run from us, not fled, then none of this would have happened. We didn’t choose to shoot him. He chose for us to shoot him with his conduct. And you’re not allowed to run from the police and try to carjack people who have just finished lunch at a restaurant and then drive directly at the police and think anything other is going to happen to you. So at the end of the day, we could have taken him into custody peacefully without any problems at all, but he chose for this to be the end.”

Or as Danny DeVito said in Renaissance Man...

The choices we make dictate the life we lead.

Or not, as the case may be. (After being shot and crashing the stolen car, officer performed CPR on him, but he was pronounced dead at a local hospital.

As I have said, I thought a long time about moving to Polk County, because I love Sheriff Judd and his approach to keeping the people of Polk County safe.

Hat tip to The Other McCain: Crime Reduction in Polk County, Florida

Say hello to 21-year-old Alex Michael Greene and, while you’re at it, go ahead and say good-bye, because Mr. Greene shuffled off this mortal coil yesterday in Polk County.

Proving Once Again That Criminals Are Not Smart

Polk Sheriff: Car burglaries solved by accidental shooting

Detectives got a break in the case just after 9 p.m. Wednesday when authorities were dispatched to a shooting in the Medulla Oaks neighborhood off Old Road 37. The sheriff's office said the one boy had accidentally shot himself in the arm at one of the other teen's homes while all three were present.

The kid who shot himself will be OK. In addition to the stolen gun, the police found IDs and a debit card that were stolen.

The sheriff's office said all three teens would be charged with armed burglary, burglary of a conveyance, grand theft of a firearm, conspiracy to commit burglary, conspiracy to commit theft, possession of a firearm by a juvenile, possession of personal identification and petit theft.

In the words of Bugs Bunny, "What a maroon."

And as always, I have to give some space to one of my favorite sheriffs.

“Most car burglaries occur to vehicles that are left unlocked, and as a law enforcement officer, that is very frustrating," Sheriff Grady Judd wrote in a statement. "Even more frustrating is when a firearm is stolen from an unlocked vehicle. Fortunately, the boy should have a full recovery, and hopefully everyone involved has learned some valuable lessons here.”

And don't leave a firearm in a car. And REALLY don't leave a firearm in an unlocked car. Yes, I know sometimes you need to leave a firearm behind to go someplace where they are not allowed. They make safes for that. (OK, so they are really little more than lock boxes; they should stop a smash and grab. And anything is better than an unlocked car.)

This almost, but not quite, qualifies as Peak Florida.

Not the Sharpest Tool in the Shed

A runner-up for the Darwin Awards. Suspect in custody after becoming trapped in burning home.

Home invasion turned shooting. Cops arrive, take the homeowner out of the house and send him to the hospital. Also remove a "woman and a small child" from the property, because they think the bad guy is still in the house. He is.

He sets fire to the house, but gets trapped by the flames.

A deputy on scene spotted the suspect from a window, where he was calling for help. The suspect was taken out of the house and into custody. [SNIP]

Deputies have reason to believe the suspect started the fire. Investigators expect him to be charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and arson.

Felony stupidity is not a violation in Texas, apparently.